Hello there. How are you? It sure has been a while hasn’t it. It seems I took an impromptu 2 week break from the blog and social media. I think I needed it. I am feeling refreshed and ready to get back on board.
Sorry for my disappearance, and thanks to those of you who were concerned, you are so sweet. Lovely to be missed and thought of too.
So where were we up to? Last time we chatted I think I was getting ready for Mini School. I will do a blog post dedicated to Mini School and tell you all about it but first lets get up to speed.
I wasn’t in a good place before Mini School. I was feeling quite sad and down and had been for some time. I was sad that my Mum and Dad were leaving but I was also just sad. It has been a shitty year basically and I haven’t been able to dig myself out of a big hole I was in.
Thank god Mum and Dad arrived and saved my sanity. Mum was such a huge help when I was cooking and then it was so fantastic to spend so much time with them. They were here for 2 months!!! They came into Mini School with us for a few nights and then headed off from Camooweal. So it is very quiet here now. Clancy is missing his lego partner.
It was so great to spend a week in Camooweal with my good friends, catching up and having some good counselling sessions with them – them counselling me! It was definitely what I needed and I have come home very refreshed. I am really going to go easy on myself and have been trying very hard not to let silly little things worry me.
The reason why I need to go easy on myself is because I am back cooking… yes my friends, I am the cook again. It didn’t end well last time, I was exhausted and in a very bad place mentally. This time round I am going to try and roll with the punches. Possibly easier said than done, but I am going to look after ME this time. We are on the lookout for a Back Packer to come and help me because I am not going to try and be Super Woman this time. Lord knows I just can’t do it all. And when I do try and do it all nothing really ends up getting done properly and I end up very upset and in tears, ugly tears. Lets face it, no one can do it all and if you think they are doing it all chances are they have a lot of help going on back stage or perhaps they just don’t have as much shit going on as you do.
The good thing about having Mum here to help me, especially while cooking, was that we both realised it is bloody hard work. We were on the go all the time and there were 2 of us. So how on earth did I think I could do it all with just one of me? Even when I wasn’t cooking it was go go go with 2 of us. It was good for me to realise that even Mum couldn’t do it all and I actually thought she was some sort of Virgo Super Human Super Woman. Turns out she isn’t. Thank god!
So basically I am back and I am trying to stay calm. I have been having a little rest after lunch each day and listening to a meditation podcast. So relaxing even if it is sometimes only for 15 minutes.
Thank goodness I had over a month away from cooking and had a good week catching up with my friends. Not sure where I would be without them. So lets do this. Lets stay calm and get cooking. And like I said, this is so much easier said than done… after staying so calm all day yesterday I totally lost my shit at bed time last night… I mean seriously, how many times do you have to ask your children to brush their teeth and go to bed, I think it took over half an hour last night. Then Clancy had a sore toe, needed a band aid to “make it feel better”, then he needed a drink… really!!!! Then the boys thought Rosie (our dog) had a snake bailed up outside, which she did, but we couldn’t find it… How does bedtime look at your house? I was so disappointed that I didn’t keep my cool. A fresh day today though, so I need to let it go and be happy.
My oven baked RISSOLES are on the menu tonight. I have just been told I don’t have to cook smoko which is a big relief because I really need to get my office in order and a bit done here at the house. I have my weekly meal plan sorted. I am on track.
How have you all been? Please tell me I am not the only one who has been stuck in a rut!
Can you relate to what I have been talking about? I bet you can!
What are your top tips for staying calm and not sweating the small stuff?
I love reading your posts Miss Chardy…wish I could help you with your mammoth mission. Bring on the Backpacker, what an amazing experience it would be for them.
Thanks for being so real…yes, I’m sure we can all relate.
Remember to breathe….xx
Hello lovely, I have been wondering about you and your clan and hoping you were just experiencing a bout of bad internet or something.
I’m sorry to hear you’ve been sad and that you are back being super woman. I’m afraid that I have no good tips to share for not sweating the small stuff – I’m a professional worrier who Bearhands regularly declares “thinks too much”.
Saying goodbye to your folks must have been tough.
Thinking of you,
A xx
Thankyou for saying that’s its ok to be sad. I don’t think we say that enough.
Hugs and hope the rest of week runs smoothly x
Welcome back! We missed you but I totally get the whole needing a break thing. Sorry you’ve been feeling sad. Wish I lived closer so I could crack a bottle of chardy with you and help out in the kitchen, although probably not at the same time as that might not be the most productive of days! xox
Hello Miss Chardy the cook. I would be completely daunted being a station cook, even though I am the grand-daughter of a cook. My Nana was a shearers cook most of her life, I wish she was still and not in hospital with dementia. She was always just so level headed and practical, whereas I’m sure I would losey nut. All the best I’ll be sending you good vibrations. And praying for a soux chef.
Hello there to you, i was thinkingthat you must’ve been having a wee break, we do all need timeout to stay sane at times. I completely get your day too yest, i was calm too all day and lost it as i had to call kids muliple times to not only have showers but get to dinner table. It doesnt seem like much, but it is if a mum is constantly having to partake in battles for even simple things with kids. I hear you! Then mums feel guilty, which we shouldnt. We missed you and its lovely to hear you & hear u are refreshed, but yes – take things slowly & we are all here waiting if you need to have wee breaks (hmm i really should rephrase that haha!) ! If some other mums make out that they are super human, there must be help behind scenes. Big hugs. 😊
Oh no, cook-less again. Good luck!
Yes, I know that stuck in a rut and feeling constantly down feeling. I can also understand why you are having those feelings. I am glad your parents being there brightened things for a bit and I am sure minischool and socialising helped a bit too. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it and take a break when you need it and make sure you do something for you as often as you can, even if it is a quiet walk without anyone else. Hopefully you find someone to help out soon.
And by the way, yes you were missed but I am glad your break refreshed you.
Hi Anne. Thanks for your message, so lovely to hear from you. I love my morning walk and I am now back from the kitchen and about to have my little lie down and listen to my meditation podcast. 🙂
I totally get it a holiday which was Devine and well overdue in Darwin and we popped to Katherine to see the Gorge on a road trip , then home to the freeze and settled on our new forever home like the day we got back from hols , moved over 2 weekends , due to the Little man having checkups @ Westmead. Home and straight into 9.5 days of The Bathurst Eistedford . OMG that is crazy , whilst trying to keep the mum taxi running. D kids to school . Unpacking is slow and doing my head in kids opened boxes of toys and books in there rooms surrounded by piles of there clothes . Living out of town is Devine but remembering I don’t have an IGA to get what is missing for dinner is taking some getting use too . Although always been a farm girl . After 7 years in the city I am retraining my brain . After 100 pantry how to on Pinterest I am sure I will be cruising . Now for the bathurst house to be finally emptied , Reno done and tenants ! And then school hols and sceduled ENT surgery for the little man at Westmead during the first week of hols !!!😂😡 how will I do ? We will get the new house sorted soon . I stress and don’t sweat the small stuff I am with u . Good luck with the cooking .
Oh Sonia, I am feeling stressed just reading that message!!! WOW. I am gobsmacked. I know I say it all the time but I really don’t know how you all do it with school and drop offs and lunches and after school activities etc etc… not to mention HOMEWORK – arrrgggggg. Love hearing about everyones mundane though because I then realise I am not alone, so thanks!!! PS: Where have you moved to?
You have been very missed! Glad you took some time out though!
Boo for cooking. I would offer to come and help….. but I know that no one wants to eat toast/cheese and crackers for dinner every night, and that is about the extent of my culinary skills. 🙂
Disclaimer: I, in no way, have my shit together but this year I have learnt;
a) not to be so hard on myself
b) podcasts and books – to get out of my own head and stop overthinking
c) baths!! (if you have one! and no kids for 30 mins!).
AND probably most importantly, I stopped trying to be the glue that holds everyone together….
I figure if people appreciate me and want me in their lives they will make the effort. Now that I am not instigating all communications, my circle has definitely decreased, but the quality has increased!! It’s sad to know that our friendship wasn’t a priority, but I think it was a good lesson for me to learn!!
Oh, and it’s not my job to make everyone happy either…. I am still working on this……
Oh Evie – I love your list of things you have learnt. You are SO RIGHT! What Podcasts are you listening to? Any new ones to tell me about? Baths are definitely good and I do love them and I am with you – I need to stop thinking it is my job to make everyone happy – I have only just figured this one out and life is better already. Thanks for your lovely message.
Hey spunk – I too have had a bit of a break, just back to the blogging world last week – having a blah moment also. Life isn’t meant to be all roses. Sorry to hear you’ve had a rough trot, but you do sound like you’re making some progress and glad you are looking after you. As for cooking, I hope you get some help soon. And we are all human and sometimes just have to ask for help. I have WAY too much work on right now because I can’t say no, but I’ve learned from it! My op went well and the biopsy benign, celebrated a birthday yesterday, my parents just left this morning and hubby now working REDICK hours so I’m a bit cranky about that but what can I do right??? Big hugs and you know what? We need to Skype each other for a laugh, some therapy for both of us xxx
O god, I am so out of the loop… what op???? But glad to hear it went well and is benign! You have been busy. No life sure was not meant to be all roses. Just off now to listen to my meditation podcast and have a little rest and me time. 🙂
I only have one tip for staying calm……scotch. lots and lots of mind numbing scotch. It will fill your time until the urge to kill passes.
Ha ha ha ha ha, good suggestion, I like it. But guess what – we are trying to detox! I had one AFD yesterday, Mr Chardy didn’t go so well, he caved at the first sight of a gold can. Dan, Miss Gabby and I are going well after one day. 🙂
It’s funny what we expect from ourselves, then when someone else tries to do the same we realise that it’s so much that we would never expect them to be able to do it! Sounds like you’re getting your head back on straight and have realised you can’t actually do it all and that’s ok. Friends are the best medicine for this, they look at us and think, you can’t do all that – and hopefully tell us!! In the same way we look at them and think they can’t do all that!!
I feel the same way at the moment though, like I need to do everything and if I don’t I’m just lazy and wasting my life… I need to get my head on straight! I’m so exhausted that I’ve had to take a day off work to rest but I feel like tomorrow I’ll be back to running my race, trying to get it all done. It’s just exhausting thinking about it all. But then if I don’t do the extra stuff I end up feeling like I’m in a rut and going nowhere which gets me down. It’s such a balancing act, which is exhausting in itself… Any suggestions???!
A number of times over the past few months I’ve spoken to people who told me they needed to pull back from doing ‘everything’ because they were just complete messes. They ended up working part time or doing something different and were able to get better over time. Maybe that’s the way to go? But I won’t do it because it’s not moving me forward and helping me ‘achieve’. Maybe it’s all about mindset…
Oh god Vanessa, you are so right! I would never expect people to do some of the things I do. And I would never expect our station cook to cook plus do everything in my house for me! No wonder my house is a mess. Can you even imagine if I told the cook it was also her job to look after my children, clean my house, do my washing, do the office work, order the stores…. blah blah blah…. never! I love your message and so sorry it has taken me forever to reply. So glad I am not the only one who feels like this. I am so hearing you … it is exhausting. I am definitely learning not to over commit. It does help. Oh and yes – the mindset – I have definitely changed my attitude and it is amazing how happy I am. I am just trying to make ME happy and not everyone else.
Could you take a little stereo into your kitchen and play some music when you cook? Might help you feel better as you work?
Thanks Marnie… have now got a dock/speaker in there and have had some tunes pumping out. I do also listen to podcasts non stop. But it is nice to have a speaker in there now so I don’t have to use my earphones all the time.
Welcome back Darryl, great read. You have inspired me. Have you tried http://www.visitoz.org for a backpacker to assist you?
I am laughing out loud at your bedtime musings – I can see the boys all out on the snake hunt in their pjs with not so much as a bag under their eyes!
Thanks love…. bloody bedtime will be the death of me. Last night I told Clancy he wasn’t ever getting anymore “hush a bye’s” – causes too much trouble… ha ha ha
You need a couple of the old cake recipes that are made in half a kero tin. Surely you could get 2 smokos out of them ?
Ha ha ha, surely!
Dear Miss Chardy, I wish I could give you a big hug… I love reading your post but never like to comment but today I will.. I know how you don’t like saying goodbye.. You always seem to be able to turn it around and you will again..ps I have tried your meatballs and my family loved them so thank you.. Be kind to yourself cos so many people in blog world need you.. Miss Helen from Linton ❌
Oh Helen… HELLO! So sorry it has taken my so long to reply, I did read your message when you wrote it and just loved it. Thanks so much for taking the time to reply, I do love it when people say hello. Things are definitely looking up here and I am much happier at the moment. So glad the meatballs were a hit. Thanks for reading! xx
So glad you are back, and glad to hear you’ve got an action plan in place. We all need one of those sometimes 😊 I hear you on the bedtime routine, it’s the same here (except no snakes, just possums!) and it is tricky but sometimes we’ve just got to go with the flow. And don’t be too hard on yourself. You are doing great! Chin up chards xxMrs T
Hi Mrs T… things are going much better here… I am learning to go with the flow and stuff the mess! It is working too, I am much happier. 🙂
Hello Miss Chardy! So lovely to hear from you again. I always look forward to your posts and hang on to your every word, I feel it keeps me in touch with No. 1 son’s world, probably not so much this year, but I still love your blog. Just like Evie Jean I learnt some time ago to let go of people who don’t make an effort, it made me feel free (eventually ). I am still my own worst critic but someone has to keep me in line! My words of wisdom this week that I have used tonight already : it is ok to be sad, and lord knows you have reason enough. Just know that lots of people care about you, gosh! Just read back through your posts if ever in doubt. Take time for you and if someone tells you they don’t loose their shit at some point with their kids – they must be lying! You are all never far from our thoughts at Chardy HQ. Big hugs.
Oh hello there Beverly! I just loved reading this message when you wrote it and sorry it has taken my so long to reply. You are such a sweetie. Thanks so much for your lovely message… and thanks for your gorgeous little care package and beautiful card I received in the mail last week, you are just gorgeous. xxx
A BIG Hello Miss Chardy gorgeous lady I have missed your blogs and glad you are back in action, just a thought for you if your interested put and add on the http://workaboutaustralia.com.au/home
This is the caravaners that work around Aussie. this may not suit you but perhaps worth a try, as you do need help. Take care and God bless you and your beautiful family
Oh Miss Chardy, how I feel for you. So sorry you’re having a rough time of it. Life’s a bit shit sometimes. I wish I was close enough to drop over some dinner for your hungry hordes from time to time, give you a big hug and crack a bottle while I’m there. I hope you find some help real soon. Sending you big love my friend. xxx
Hey Miss Chardy,
Maybe there is something in the water as I have been a little sad of late. There are a few reasons but nothing really concerning. It is not a nice place to be! I also feel for you in the cooking stakes I cooked on a property up around you guys for 12 months for around 30. I had some high highs and some low lows! http://www.norrisaroundaustralia.com
Hi Miss Chardy,
I was just thinking yesterday about sending you an email saying ‘R U Ok’ (except I would have spelt it out properly because I’m usually pedantic like that!), and then your post turned up. So sorry you are back cooking again. What a massive task. Every day my cousin feeds her sons who work on the farm and I know they like 3 cooked meals per day. What’s wrong with sandwiches I wonder?! And I know your crew are large in number, as well as appetite. Breathe, and know that the right person is out there to share this load with you. Thinking of you.
Love Jo
Hi Chards – are you still taking the 30plus? If not get back on them. PS I’m hearing you sister. We try and juggle lots of balls and the one we always seem to drop is the “us” ball. I just had to back out of helping with a conference because I was sinking. I was sick with worry about telling the person but when I did it I was so relieved, but even that wasn’t enough and I was holding on with a thin wedge. I have gotten a bit of help and boy oh boy does that hour a day make a difference. When we’re “outbush” we don’t get those little boosts our city sisters do from a friend or relative taking the kids or helping you juggle a ball for a while and I’ve learnt this month it’s ok to say I need help. Good luck with the backpacker search we had a flood apply for our last position. Look after yourself.
Oh dear. I’m glad to see you back but really hope you do take it easy. I think there must be something in the air at the moment because I have had the blues like I’ve never had before. It’s tough. Especially when we are trying to do all the things. Please look after yourself. It sounds like you are doing all the right things – resting, meditating. We are most definitely not Super Women – even Virgos like myself. I always thought I could do it all and do it well but the reality is something gives and it can get very ugly indeed. Take care lovely lady. And don’t put pressure on yourself to get blog posts out. We’re all still here. Much love. xx
Hey Miss Chardy. Nothing to add to the lovely comments above, I hope that they give you a leg up. Chin up girly, it will all turn out in the end (and overthinking it all in the between times is a bit pointless and will just send you quietly mad).
I’m so impressed at your meditation and AFD routine, go you! I will have to try harder, I find I make lists of all the things I could/should/would be doing instead of meditating.