Life on an Outback Cattle Station: Dial Some Rain

March 28, 2018

Are you after some rain?  Waiting for the wet season to hit perhaps?  In drought?  Well look no further.

CALL 1800RAIN

I will send my car and it will definitely rain.  This baby is your ticket out of the drought….

Yep – the Prado rainmaker.  Just back her out of the shed and it will start raining.  Pack her up ready for a trip to town and it will rain.  Book some appointments and accommodation: it will definitely rain.

So if you are looking for some rain on your country or just on your road to town, call me!  I will bring the old Prado around and we will break that drought.  Now, on with the story…

The wet season this year seems to have forgotten us.  You wouldn’t think so would you with all the images of water and rain around the traps and on the news but there seems to be a big hole over us (and many others).  We have had a pretty good run for about the past 9 years but this year it just doesn’t want to rain.  I don’t think we have cracked 5 inches – it should be more like 16 inches by now.

But you know what – it does rain when you want to drive someone.  ALWAYS!  When ever I want to go someone in that grey Prado – bam – it rains.  I kid you not, I should seriously park it out in the paddock and just leave it there.  Then it would rain for sure.  For those who are new around here we have 165km of dirt road – it aint pretty in the wet and impassable with a good shower.   Now don’t get me wrong – we love the rain, if only it would just set in and stop playing mind games with us.

So this morning I got up at 5 and put my make up on.  I don’t usually do this each morning but today we were planning on heading to town.  My oldest boy Tom – who is at boarding school in Brisbane – is flying home today.  Now when I say home, I mean he is flying to Mt Isa and we have to drive 5 hours in there to collect him.

Mr Chardy needed to pick up a truck in town, and a heap of stores/gear, and Miss Ruby was going home for the school holidays, so we were going to make a family trip of it in the Prado.  We have a heap of stores to collect in town too, so there was a big list of jobs, not to mention a dentist appointment for Clancy who seems to have a hole in his tooth – mother of the year!!!

We were all set, ready to head off at 6:30 this morning.  Of course last night, while in bed, I hear the pitter patter of rain of the roof – OF COURSE I DID!!!  Man, are you serious.  We took the Prado out of the shed yesterday and put it in the workshop because it needed a bit of R&M from the last trip into the station where some serious damage was done, but more on that later.  So yep, the Pradie Dard was out and the rain came too.  Not much, just enough to muck us around.  It would be fantastic if it set in and really had a go, but it is just enough to stuff us up.  So that damaged Prado is not going anywhere near a muddy road now – time for plan b.

We are not sure what plan b is.  Tom fly’s into Mt Isa tonight.  Mrs Savvy B might be able to pick him up otherwise I will have to hit another friend up.  We are thinking we might be able to try and get to town today in a ute but it isn’t really worth it if we can’t bring the truck home with all of our stores.  Oh and would you listen to that, just as I type these words the rain gets heavier.  Would be great if it sticks arounds and puts in a bit of effort.

Now, you know how I said it only rains when we want to drive somewhere… well let me tell you about our trip back in here after our holidays in January…

It was as dry as in January – and December for that matter.  Didn’t really rain for the whole 4 weeks we were away on holidays in January.  The holiday is always well and truly over by the time you get to Mt Isa or Camooweal.  Mr Chardy’s work ute was in Camooweal so it was there that we parted ways and drove in separate vehicles.  There still hadn’t been any rain at home so off we went.  It was all going well until we were about 100km from home and well and truly on the dirt.  A storm had gone through just in front of us and the road was wet the whole way from then on.

We ploughed on and the Prado struggled.  It was that sticky black soil and it totally clogs up the wheel arches.  We had to stop and try and get the mud out so we could continue on otherwise you can hardly move and it is like burning rubber – that hard clay rubbing against the tyres (said tyres are now basically ruined and need replacing).  We managed to clear it out a little bit but by this time it had ripped into the wheel arches and we had lost a mud flap… but we continued on.

About 40km’s from home we decided enough was enough.  Georgie our Headstockman had headed out to meet us and Mr Chardy was still going ok in his ute.  Now, can I just say that the road was dry when Georgie headed out so the storm was literally right in front of us.  If we had have left 1 hour earlier from town we would have nailed it.  But that’s life isn’t it.  This is how dry it was at the NT/QLD border gate – welcome to paradise Ruby…

We decided to abandon ship and had to leave the Prado out in the paddock.  So we piled all of our stuff that we really needed into the ute and off we went.  Ruby must have been thinking “what the hell have I got myself into” and I kept say “welcome to Bum Truck Nowhere Rubes… aren’t you glad you came”.  What a welcome for her.  She had to pile in the back of the ute with Harry and Clancy had to sit on the fridge in the front with me.

Time for a costume change, these shoes just weren’t going to cut it…

#realgoviesofthenorthernterritory

What a circus.  This is how I was feeling… FFS!!!  (Mum, that stands for: For Frogs Sake)

This road was dry when Georgie drove out…

The rain was gone by the time we got home and never to be seen again until we wanted to drive somewhere or get people in.  It loves to stir you up like that – really mess with your head, ha ha ha.

Now – an update on what’s happening… it is still raining and we have canned our trip because this is what our Bore Runner’s Ute looks like after his run this morning…

My gorgeous friend Mrs Savvy B is in town and she is going to stick around to pick Tom up from the plane, then god only knows how he will get here – ute, plane, chopper – who the hell knows.  Thank god for good friends, she saves me every single time.

To my friend Karen – I am sorry – we will get Ruby to you I promise.  Watch this space and we will keep you posted.  Don’t mind us, Ruby and I will just hang out with our make up on – like an episode of Bold and the Beautiful.

As for Clancy’s hole… well that is just going to have to wait.  There is also the small issue of my passport – still haven’t actually submitted that application for our trip in May…. no biggie – right?

So, although I do love living up here at Bum Truck Nowhere (no doubt Ruby does too….) – it certainly has its challenges and this dirt road caper is one of them.  It is really the only thing that drives me crazy, I don’t mind the dirt road, I just hate muddy roads.

How about you.  Where do you live?  Bum Truck Nowhere like me or maybe just around the corner from your local school.  Let us know.

Now, if you don’t mind I just need to take the Prado out into the paddock and wait for the wet season to set in.  Over and Out.

 

10 Comments

  1. Mrs Rumbo

    Hahahaha Chards, love it! Just as well you’ve already had your social hit or mum may have learnt a few new terms, lol.

    Reply
    • Miss Chardy

      Wouldn’t she just, ha ha ha ha. Of course the sun is out now… we may have just had our biggest downpour yet – 15mm!!! Wowsers.

      Reply
  2. Miss Helen

    Oh dear … you need that rain too. Hope you manage to get the trip sorted. Nice to catch up in the Alice x

    Reply
    • Miss Chardy

      So great to catch up with you too Helen!!!

      Reply
  3. Lindsay

    Hilarious! Im new here and love how you can find amusement in the most annoying of circumstances. Hope Easter brings some decent rain your way!

    Reply
    • Miss Chardy

      Welcome Lindsay, so glad to have you here. Thanks for the message and I am so happy you enjoy hearing about our life here in the Outback. Happy Easter to you.

      Reply
  4. CJ

    These are my favourite stories- just regular everyday life from your (rainy) corner of Aus! Thank you.

    Reply
    • Miss Chardy

      So glad you enjoy them, thanks for letting me know. Sometimes I think no one wants to hear these boring stories. Wish I had have taken video footage from my recent day trip to town, would have made for an awesome movie for you all. Maybe next time.

      Reply
  5. Heidi

    Oh Chardy, you have such a gift of making me laugh even when the situtation is not laughable.
    You have such a great outlook, but I have a feeling all of the “Real Housewives of the NT”are made of tough stuff. I can’t wait until you’re in NYC, we’ll only be 1 hour time difference instead of 17!!

    Reply
    • Miss Chardy

      Ha ha ha – I can’t wait until I am in NYC either – not long to go. Finally got my passport sorted (well I hope I did) just waiting for it now. Fingers crossed there isn’t any trouble with it. So glad I can make you laugh Heidi.

      Reply

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