Catching Up

Well boy, hasn’t it been a while between posts.  I am nothing if not INCONSISTENT when it comes to blog posts.  Every year I think – “Right, this year I am going to blog consistently”.  I start off well and then things get busy, before you know it July has rolled around and I fall off the blogging wagon.  I know everyone gets busy, so I can’t really use that as an excuse.

I was going well with my New York update blog posts and then I went on one of Mrs Savvy B’s Trek West Hikes to help her.  That meant being out of service/internet for a week and it all went pear shaped from there and I feel like I have been catching up ever since.  But that was a month ago so I really need to pull my socks up.

I am really good at beating myself up about these things too.  Do you do that?  In my mind everyone lives a perfect life, in their perfect houses that look like they come out of a Country Style magazine, they have perfect families and don’t ever get cross at their kids, they have lots of patients and do lots of fun things with their kids.  Their kids can all ride horses because their Mums are all really great outdoorsy types….

Am I the only one who has these thoughts running through their heads?  I know it is all bullshit but when you live out here in the middle of nowhere and don’t see other families on a daily basis it is easy to fall into the trap of thinking like this.

I look around my house and station and think – no one else would have all of this mess around, I bet no one else’s laundry is as messy as mine, I bet everyone else has an amazing lush garden and they are basically Peter Cundell.  I look around at all the things I should be doing and it is just exhausting.

Maybe it is just the post school holiday mess?  The past few weeks have been quite busy but they have been wonderful, so why am I beating myself up?  My kids had a great time in the school holidays, there was a birthday, there were kids over for sleepovers, there was lots of boys, lots of motorbike riding and cubby building and playing OUTSIDE, even camping out in the cubby.  My Mum and Dad were even here for a few weeks, so it was really fabulous.  There were lots of people around our dining table.  It is very satisfying feeding boarding school kids too, can I just say.  They love anything you cook for them and eat up big, such a nice change.

I turned a blind eye to the mess and decided to enjoy the kids and my Mum and Dad.  I only get to see Mum and Dad once or twice a year so I made the most of it.

In the school holidays we even had to team up as the family stock camp and help Mr Chardy up at the yards one day.  Preg testing and trucking.  It was so good to be up there all together.  And would you look at that – tick: outdoorsy type!!! NAILED IT.

Finally – we can all do it, no babies, no toddlers, everyone can get in and have a go.

Harry went on school camp at the end of the school holidays.  The year 6 kids headed to Canberra.  So Miss Ruby had an extra week with her family as it has just been Clancy in the school room this week. I have been teaching Clancy this week which has been pretty good.  We are off to town today to do a few station jobs, collect a few stores and also collect Harry.

I reckon next week I might be able to get back on track and back into some sort of routine.  Ha ha ha ha – lets be honest, there is no such thing as routine on a station.  Things are changing all the time, just like life really.  Things never stay the same do they.  You have to move with the cheese.

In the holidays Clancy turned 7.  Can you even believe it.  Crazy.  SEVEN!!!

This basically means that we are done with all things baby, toddler and small kid stuff.  He doesn’t have to have a car seat anymore.  That was the last thing we had to go.  Now before we know it we will be celebrating kids 18th Birthdays… Tom will be 14 this year!!!  So I guess it is on with the next stage.

Now, can we just talk about family photos.  I really need some therapy on this front.  It seems my family are HIGHLY ALLERGIC to participating in family photos.  Seriously, it is really not that hard to look at a camera and smile or pretend to be normal for 2 seconds is it?  Is that really too much to ask.  So every year on every birthday I have these great expectations for Birthdays, I want them to be perfect and I want everyone to have fun but somehow I always end up losing my shit and getting really upset.  This birthday was no exception.  Shit was lost, good and proper.  It wasn’t pretty my friends.

Poor little Clancy.  We made his cake and he wanted to decorate it himself. He had a lovely time and the cake was perfect.  I thought it was best we cut the cake and get this dreaded photo out of the way at lunch time so off we went.  Gather round people, lets do this.  Clancy was as proud as punch, sitting there in front of his cake, he had gathered the party plates and the cake cutter and was all set.  Ok gather round brother and husband, lets get a family photo… well this is when it turned to shit.

Oh dear lord.  Everyone was carrying on an absolute treat, Clancy was sitting there ready for the photo and the other boys (husband included) were being silly.  Come on guys just look at the camera and smile, it isn’t that hard – there may have been a small amount of yelling at this stage and possible swearing involved (all from me), all while DD & Rex tried to take a photo, it was an absolute circus.  In the end we got some photos and took myself off to my room and put myself in time out.  I was in tears by this stage.  I mean, what the hell is wrong with me?  I just felt so bad for Clancy.  It is really not that hard to participate in a photo.  I was so cross and so upset, I just wanted Clancy to have a great day – which he did.  But good lord, what a show.

Does this happen to anyone else?  I think I am cancelling family photos on Birthdays from this point forward.  Is it really necessary.  In the end I was hurling out comments like “great, so when you are 21 and wondering where the hell all your Birthday photos are you can remember this day”.  I tell you, it is no wonder it is near on impossible to find a family photo of us.

So there you have it, a little catch up from my end.

If you also suffer from Great Expectations you may like to read THIS blog post from Baby Mac.  It is the very first blog post I read of hers back in 2014 and it totally resonated with me, I felt like she was writing this just for me.  I have been hooked on her blog ever since.   Thanks Beth!  Ok I have just re-read that post and my goodness, it seems this is definitely what happened to me this time – talk about over expectations.  I really do need to take a chill pill.  Over and out.